Arranged Love Marriages - Instablogs
Arranged Love Marriages
Sameer Rout , Bangalore: Jun 11 2008
Made Popular Jun 13 2008
India :

I am not sure of the way we have moulded our cultural values and call ourselves the modern Indians. Taking a very simple yet important custom in focus – Marriage, has actually become a materialistic concept. Can we exactly define Arranged or Love marriages? Because what happens is two sexes meet given they are of same caste, religion , acceptable age and then they actually analyze each other and proceed towards love. Well in the cosmopolitan lingo I should say – Are you kidding me Guys???
The concern is not that we are changing but that we are not changing. On roots , we are adopting the same cultural attitude ,that had been degenerated with time ,in new masks. The origin of our culture was very pure and worth wondering as people millions of years ago had those ideals which we adulate in today’s world. Without making a discussion on our culture let me actually come to the misleading of lives by the Modern Indians.
Being a part of todays youth generation , I am not very sure of how our previous generation was , but perhaps they were perfect in their thinking . We are actually not following what we think but making compromises and hiding it with our hypocratic cosmopolitan attitude. If this how we love a guy or gal then I doubt how many have actually loved their parents. The point is we love because we need to or we love because it is a genuine human emotion??? The answer to this question will be very ambiguous if asked in a survey.
Without making this issue a really silly one, I want to highlight that are we robotizing ourselves? If not then where are the aboriginal human emotions!!

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1 Stars
Asmita
Shimla, India
Sameer you certainly chose a very though provoking topic but I really didn’t understand whether you wanted to probe the issue of arranged ”love” marriages or the lack of sensitivity in an increasingly mechanized society. For me personally, I think all relationships are a gamble.

They require effort on part of both the partners. Even if it is a love marriage, an arranged match or even a love-arranged thing, if you don’t try to make the relationship work and give your partner the time and space they need to grow as a person, the relationship will sour no matter how much you may have loved each other at the time you got married!!
1 Stars
Sameer Rout
Bangalore, India
Hi Asmita,

Well the problem with my articles is that I invoke the reader’s mind to think deep. In other words I dont actually present a very clear mindset, it is done actually for running their thought process faster! Strange but if you think it is true.

The essence of my article was that the relationships that I see now a days are not that beautiful and pure as it deserves to be! Saying that i dont mean that we are facing some sort of crisis . But yes, the priorities have changed!!

You agree??
2 Stars
Deepa
mumbai, India
Arranged or Love, Marriage is an institution of commitment which requires both the partners to be tolerant and compromising over and above the basic fact of loving each other. U can fall in love with someone and marry or vice versa too. That is irrelevant with the fact of working out a relationship to the fullest.
1 Stars
Sameer Rout
Bangalore, India
Any relationship is an institution rt?

I totally agree with your philosophy of love. But would you like to answer my question - there is a different between compromise and sacrifice rt? Adn how m any times are we expected or compelled to pursue a relationship just not to invite the world to go mad about it? Iam not talking only of marriages! Take any other relation ..
1 Stars
Deepa
mumbai, India
Sameer, there is a very fine line distinguishing the two words, compromise and sacrifice. And its an individual’s personal perception about the both that can determine if it’s a compromise or a sacrifice. And yes this does apply to all relationships existing……even the most sought after one of friendship. However I don’t believe in pursuing a relation only to prove your social standing. Why should you suffer for the sake of few wagging tongues? Only you have to believe in someone, to hold on to them…..be it at any cost. Or else let go…..
1 Stars
Sameer Rout
Bangalore, India
Well Deepa, that is what exactly I wanted to hear but then we dont commit the same way as we think rt I mean are you sure what ever u have said now , it will be folowed by you ? I mean exceptions are always allowed but still generally would you do the same? Dont take it personal. Just asking!
1 Stars
Deepa
mumbai, India
On a personal level, I have successfully pursued some relations on the same principles. Though it isn’t as easy and agreeable as it sounds, but then I have always followed my heart and reaped the benefits! Dunno what the future has in store for me....but hope to live it on the same terms.
1 Stars
Leena
Kolkata, India
Concentrating on the statement from the article ‘The point is we love because we need to or we love because it is a genuine human emotion???’

I would like to say that there are no two reasons for loving. There is always a singular reason for love and that is a genuine human emotion coming right from the heart of the individual who loves for another individual. This emotion is timeless and is not influenced by any changes in times or lifestyles or outlooks etc.

We can never love a person because we need to. For that matter you can never even like a person just because you need to.
When you choose to stay in a relationship whether it be a matrimonial or otherwise by compromising and sacrificing, out of materialistic interests there is no love or liking there at all. It is just that you have learned to adjust with the other person.
1 Stars
Karpagam Kannan
chennai, India
File Type: Image
yes sameer I agree with you,nowadays they are still conservative in side but boast they are modern out side.Iv seen many couples marry for the sake of getting married but doesn’t really love the relation ship or the spouse.This may lead to extra marital affairs that in turn lead to the increase in murder rate and illegal activities which we can see in latests news.Why should one marry just for the sake of it? better wait for the one u really like or just let it go why to chose
what comes the way just to get married.
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